My future sucks

Today I spoke to the person who determined my life over phone. Half way through September,  my year in school had an assembly telling us about work experience. By the time 2010 had ended I had contacted every video type work place in Somerset and some in Wiltshire (from two companies that specialise in wallace and grommet type things) and anxiously waited for their  reply . I got none. I chased them all up via email . One  apologised  and said they thought they had sent a reply letter , another had saying no and that's all the reply I got. I waited for their replies for a month and on the side contacted 6 photographers and 2 graphic designers they said no and the replies still hadn't arrived so I gave up then and went to move on to the animation companies . One wanted a hand written letter too compare me  to lots of other interested people , he also wanted me to bring in a show reel , i told him i didn't have one . he wished me good luck and said goodbye . I chose not to send the letter as it was clear i wouldn't get the place and my handwriting is atrocious . I phoned the other company after that and they asked for a letter I asked if by email was okay .They said yes , quicker that way. I got a reply saying that week is fine and there is plenty for me to do there that week , the guy said we just want to know why you want this . I replied with pretty much an essay talking about my passion for video work. two days after the reply. I waited eagerly again hoping to send the forms soon i only had a week and 2 days left . the reply never came . i called and rang over and over and over again for 2 weeks and 3days . yes past my deadline . I was stuck . I phoned a local shop and asked for a placement there no reply . i was way past my deadline by now. eventually the teacher we have for this kind of thing talked to me offered for me to do a project and contacted a company that would sponsor it. I don't know what they said she never talked to me , until i received a notice that morning in tutor asking me to see her in her office about  a woman who came in to talk to me about jobs and just for me work experience . she was going to help me , except my bitch of a drama teacher wouldn't let me go since it was in her lesson. we weren't doing anything important .  I soon gave up on that idea and in the half term after my prepaid little holiday with Jade I went to Glastonbury high street to ask for places .  One woman said she already had one for the week there . Another said she wasn't sure and gave a me a number to contact about it  and said i couldnt call till wednesday. another place looked very very promising . They liked me we had a chat I sneakily showed them how ideal  was for the job even for a week and it loked good they asked me to come back round next week after a few days . I forgot i had to go there and when i remembered the shops would be closed when i got there , so i phoned. She said it wouldn't be an experience and during that week they want to close for a couple of days and go out and they can't do that f i'm there so a no from them . I then phoned the number the woman gave me . It was on hold . for a very long time . After 10 minuets of waiting i finally got through , the guy there said i had  wrong number and gave me the correct one . I phoned up , no answer the shop had closed . I am going to have to go to school for that week and be the only one because  I am the last one in the entire year. I am never going to get a job . I am never going to move out. I am never going to be able to afford rent in my parents house. I am going to be a starving dirty hobo and as i stood in the mirror struggling to lift my double chin up at the same time as squeeze the big fat spot under my double chin I realised I am way too ugly to even be a prostitute to earn money. I can't get a part time job , I have tried . I can't get work experience ,I have tried and im not going to get a life . The left of my existence is from now to end of year 11 and hopefully i will get enough bloody c's to make up for shitty d's and at least get one A level . Now excuse me I have to revise for a drama test i'm going to fail much to the hobag from hells glee ( yes the same demon who wouldn't let me go ) Joy