Sigh

Okay rather than explaining y I havnt uploaded I'm just gonna start. I have had an up and down weekend. It was the first weekend of Easter holidays YAY I'm going to Emilys for a sleepover YAY with my sister ugh I missed jades BBQ ugh we had fun YAY emily and I touched each other in unknown ways to young girls ;) I heart her baby bewbs :p nxt morning fine swell had IFC for breakfast went shopping with no money got pissed of at clears for being expensive off lip balm for £8 who's gonna buy that ?! Then my boyfriend tested me YAY he said wubu2 nd I was like shopping blah blah miss u xoxo then he was like he need to have a serious talk nd I was like uh oh shit u gonna dump me nd he was like yer sorry then explained nd I got upset then angry nd argued then guilty then apologised . And I'm pretty bloody disappointed . I'm gonna be all sappy and admit I was in love with him and it was the first time truly in love nd I was happy , now I also admit I'm also very Insicure (sp?) and I worry if my friends still like me do they bitch about me nd all that but I trust them so I know they arnt but I still worry and I font know if u know this but I love my friends so much I would happily die for them , anyway I had the same worries about J but I decided to trust him and I felt betrayed and hurt by him . He told me it was because he had lots of revising to do for his exams coming up and he didn't think it would be fair on me because I would never see him and we can carry on when jes gone to collage. I wish I could truly believe that and trust him to tell me the truth about y he broke up with me but I trusted him not to do that to me so doon in the first place I mean look at the pathetic exudes iv used in the past awfully similar intact quoting clubs Tver revision is my exuse . I don't know what to believe but I do know I don't want to leave this in a bad way and we are leaving us I'm not something to be shoved away then baught back again when he's ready I can't be put-on hold . Ah this sounds oh so cheesy I wonder r if part of me thinks this is a wattpad story and he'll come running back to me nearby a meanful thoughtful gift or some American cheese like that . Meh there I go again sounding like a moony hormonal teenage girl oh wait I am one ugh this sucks :( this holiday better get better it il be 'we'll' pussed of :) if you got this far in my complaint congratulations u deserve a virtual cookie . Go on take one youv earned it font worry I promise they won't take up much memory :p - Rainiepie xoxo